My Eyeballs

The unfathomable amounts of reading is turning my sub-par vision in to non-existent, old woman, nearly blind vision. I can't figure out what is the main cause of this... but I have narrowed it down:

1. Straight-up regular book reading:
As I finished the 20th page of Constitutional Law reading for tomorrow, I honestly thought that my eyeballs were going to up and leave my skull. The words were doing Riverdance all of the page and I had to SERIOUSLY concentrate on finishing the last 3 pages. I am considering getting some reading glasses, even though I never had a problem with far-sightedness.

2. Computer Screen Eye Melt-a-thon:
After typing the beast of a memo due last Monday, I had to take a break from all things "screen" related for 24 hours. I thought that pre-grad school, I had my eyes glued to some sort of screen for a large portion of the day. Facebook, Email, Stumble, Stumble, Stumble, My Sweet Sixteen, Woot, Paper, Stumble. I think I managed to add an extra 4 hours to every day just for screen staring. I have become a professional... and it is making my eyeballs go poopy.

3. I hate carrots:
I have no idea if carrots actually improve eyesight but I freaking hate them. Bring on the blindness.

4. Booooooooooze:
Is it possible that the amount of booze consumed increases that the effectiveness of vision decreases? I know it has that temporary effect. Oh the joys of writing a text at 3am with one eye closed and the other eye in "squint-mode" hoping that whatever keys you jam on the phone will create a coherent sentence. I am worried that the possibility of "drunken-blindness" could be permanent one day. Oh no.

Either way, my eyes are crapping out. My graduation gift to myself will be Lasik. Oooooooooo yeah.

(P.S. Why must I list everything? Am I a list-a-holic?)

Who Can Say What Dreams Are?

This is an Emo blog.

I will not trouble you all with the lengthy discussion of my stresses, worries, and overwhelming To-do list. No sleep. No time. No life.

Anyway, I am just saying that hopefully me, the real me, will be back soon.

Cut it out.

This will be a very short blog, but I have been meaning to post it for quite sometime.

The following includes a list of things that are unacceptable for a classroom setting. Some people find this very hard to grasp, so I have complied a "No-No" list for the severely confused.

1. The "horn/elephant/face explosion nose blow." I understand that it is "sick season". Keeping a double ply roll of toilet paper in your back pack is completely understandable. Blowing your nose as if you are trying to imitate a rocket launcher exploding gak is completely ridiculous and distracting. Stop it.
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2. The "I am going to talk for 423 years about a question that doesn't matter and makes the prof. want to vomit." It is great that you want to impress your professor. More power to you. I can guarantee that talking to them about the historical implications of the first pleading ever written will make them want to die (also known as zero bonus points) Cut it out. (This also includes an "tangent is an acceptable thing to talk about for 30 minutes.")

3. The "my phone is vibrating louder than Jenna Jameson's butt plug but I some how can't hear it." If I can hear your phone 7 seats away, you must be deaf and/or retarded. Turn your shit to silent.

4. The "apparently I learned to whisper from a child at a funeral". Everyone in class has something to whisper to their neighbor. The key word is whisper. If you sound like you are trying to chat to someone in a crowded bar, that is NOT a whisper. Shut up.

5. The "I'll brown-nose my way to the top" method. Your professor thinks you suck. Quit it.

Just keep these 5 tips in mind the next time you are in class. Do your fellow classmates a favor. :)