Saturday, February 25, 2012

Bus Sprints

I take the bus to school. One of the college student perks is a free bus pass. It isn't really a perk... but my student loans pay for it instead of my credit card.

The morning regional bus, the "B" or the "BX" comes every 15 minutes or so. Additionally, I have a 12-15 minute walk to the bus every morning.

I have a couple different bus options:
Option #1 (Also known as "Option Number Never Fucking Happens")
Leave my house at 7:55am. Have a lovely morning stroll to the bus. Arrive at the bus stop a couple minutes before the bus arrives. Hop on the 8:13 bus. Get to school with plenty of time to fill my water bottle, pee, grab books, etc.

Option #2
Leave my house at 8:10am. Have a lovely morning stroll to the bus. Arrive at the bus stop a couple minutes before the bus arrives. Hop on the 8:24 bus. Get to school with just enough time to grab books and power-walk to class.

Option #3
Leave my house at 8:13am thinking "I'm totes gonna make the 8:24 bus. I'll just put Kanye on my iPod and speed-walk like an Olympian." Proceed speed-walking like this--> RACE WALK


Now, option #1 is practically a joke, so I'll just move on. Option #2 is the perfect situation. This happens 3 or 4 times a week.

It is option #3 that causes problems. For some reason, even though I know that if I leave my house at 8:13 I am not going to make the damn bus if I walk the whole way there. There is that moment when I am walking up the path and I see the RTD bus stopped at a stop light. It is then that I have to choose between missing the bus and subsequently being late to class OR the dreaded Bus Sprints.

What are Bus Sprints?
It is the moment where you see the bus, but you are much to far away to catch it at "walking speed". So you tighten the backpack straps, throw the lunch bag over your shoulder, and you run like hell.

Sometimes Bus Sprints result in a complete win. You run your ass off and arrive just in time to to jog on to the bus. Although I am breathing like a morbidly obese lady who just conquered her first flight of stairs, I will be on time to class AND I slept for an extra three minutes.

Sometimes, you loose at Bus Sprints.

About a week ago, I decided to gamble with Option #3 (again). I see the bus at the stop light. I commence Bus Sprints. This particular game of Bus Sprints was going well. I was going to make it. All I had to do was run up this snow covered hill and I was home free.

Now, "run up this snow covered hill" does not equal logic. Two steps up the hill I face-plant. No, no no. I didn't fall. I was sprinting with a backpack and two bags slung around each arm. I went down HARD. My body was covered in snow and it hurt everywhere. I peeled my face from the frozen ground to see the bus driving away from the bus stop. There was a guy (who I assume was also partaking in bus sprints) came up to me and asked if I was ok. I said "barely" as I started collecting all the things that scattered amongst the snow.

He said "we missed the bus." I just looked at him. Eventually I muttered "uh.. yeah."

I limped my way up the rest of the hill and waited for the next bus.

The lesson of this story is not to wake up early (or even on time.)

The true lesson is:
If I am running late, drive my fat ass the .94 miles to the bus stop like every other American.


Win.